He got a well paying job, a nice
apartment in a secure estate. We all know him, he is hitting 40. Most of his
pals have families, he spends his weekends attending rugby events and road
trips. He has a steady girlfriend, they just celebrated their 5th
anniversary. She was expecting the big surprise but it never happened, he
didn’t pop the question that she has been waiting for the past 3 years. She has
given him all the right signs but the guy can’t simply read them! The guy seems
okay with how things are but she isn’t! so what happens when he cannot commit?
Stories have been peddled that men
actually do not decide when to marry, women in their lives decide that for
them. I come from a place where whenever a man took long to marry or find a
‘suitable’ girl, the aunties would ensure there was some sort of ‘accidental’ meeting
between him and the girl they see fit for him. I understand that the strategy
had a 90% success rate and most families in my village that have stood over
decades started off with a ‘setup’.
The 21st century, marrying has
become a personal decision and no longer
a social thing as in the past. I think it is right to say today men love their
freedom more at the expense of a family. Let me play the devils advocate and let me take you to a mans
mind. You see commitment to man means losing 70% freedom which is true! Picture
this, every evening you have to account to every second of the day, this is suicidal
for some guys. On Fridays a man mind is reading ‘Imma go to the bar with my
boys and have a good time but oh am married! So I have to go home, have dinner,
make love to my wife and sleep.’ Any time a man will pick the 1st
thought and the question he will hear next
is “Baba Brian, its 3am!where the *&$%! are you coming from?” to avoid all these a
man will rather remain single and keep his freedom.
Men's lack of interest to commit have
also been blamed on the neglect of the boy child. There are no longer mentors
who can guide our boys on the important issues in life. Today the boy child
grows on his own, left to learn by himself and instill values he sees right.
These values FromWhereIstand… may be exactly opposite to what women expect.
Comments
Post a Comment